Reverb10 Day 29: My defining moment


Defining moment. Describe a defining moment or series of events that has affected your life this year. – Author: Kathryn Fitzmaurice

For most of my life I never fought back. When I was bullied, I never punched or slapped the person back. When I felt I was wronged, I kept my mouth shut and didn’t say a word. When a family member said something to me that I didn’t like, the mouth was still shut. I think it was the way I was raised – don’t make a scene, don’t embarrass yourself. I don’t think it came from my parents, but from other family members. I also felt so uncomfortable making a scene… I didn’t want to start one! This led to people taking advantage of me, telling me what to do, what I should think, etc.

I got tired of it.

My defining moment came in October when the first part of the fracas with student aid occurred. I felt wronged. No where did it say that you only got the years of your program + one, for funding. It was never mentioned when I called, nor in the paper work you have to fill out. I was also being penalized for something they weren’t going to penalize me for a few years ago.

I felt that if there are rules to how much money you’re going to get, if there’s limit on how long you’ll get funding or if rules change that they needed to be a bit more on the ball and let the applicants know. I think that if these apply, they should have sent out a letter with your first application and let you know about it.

I fought. I fought real hard and I finally got the funding.

Now I have to fight again because of a mistake made by the university. Tomorrow I am going to sit down and write a letter; in the upcoming weeks, I’m going to the university to make sure they straighten out everything on their end. Can you imagine nearly being done with your degree and because someone gives wrong information, it screws up everything? It was like someone took my heart out of my chest and stomped on it. Like someone dangled the carrot and then took it away.

Fighting the first time was my defining moment. I stood up for myself and instead of sitting back and saying, “Okay… just deal with it. You’ll find a way.”, I took control and went for it.

I was so proud of myself. I finally stood up for myself and it felt great.

“I think every individual has his or her own power, and it’s a matter of working, taking time and defining what that power is.” – Jill Scott



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